The Stories that Shaped Me

Cast your mind back to the 1990’s. Sydney summers, fuelled by coconut oil and Slap Bands. I was busy, losing myself in make-believe worlds and characters, singing and dancing to Madonna’s Immaculate Collection and clomping around the house in my grandmother’s high-heeled shoes with a tea towel on my head, believing I was the queen of pop. 

What a time to be alive. It was during the hypercolour age that I discovered the author and imagination expert, Roald Dahl. I was in grade four when Ms Wesley (my favourite teacher) introduced me to The Twits. I was captivated. I moved on to The Witches and made my way through Dahl’s weird and wonderful catalogue armed with a Roll Up for that extra kick. 

Dahl captured my heart with his clever way of merging light and shade with his storytelling and characters. In The Witches, I found protagonist Luke Eveshim to be a relatable antihero (along with his grandmother Helga Eveshim) taking on the Grand High Witch of a nasty (yet sophisticated) coven. This showing of Luke and Helga being two (extra)ordinary characters, dipping into their resourcefulness and courage, opened my eyes up to the concept of the antihero while sparking my imagination into writing stories of my very own, and so began my fascination with unexpected protagonists and fabulous antagonists.

Enter the dark ages (or commonly known as the teen years). A decade filled with rebellion, smoking weed and Smashing Pumpkins. Along with a newfound confidence and brash hostility for the world around me, R.L Stein’s Fear Street series was the perfect collection to feed my teenage angst. 

From paranormal activity to slasher horror, Stein ignited my appreciation for the horror genre. The outrage and adrenaline of reading his characters’ plights, bouncing between hope and hopelessness, schooled me in the art of high drama and evoking emotion through plot twists and subplots. While I would probably not go back and read this series again, I can say, at the time, I loved it. 

Now, it was not all doom and gloom with my reading choices through the dark ages. For my 16th birthday, my uncle Glenn gifted me a book which would open my mind to new possibilities forever. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho was the first book I read which led me to read in a new way, as well as being a form of entertainment; all of a sudden, I was excited to read content which held an element of universal truth. Spiritually charged and beautifully crafted, Coelho pulled my young mind away from horror and gore, and over to curiosity of self-discovery. A reading journey which I continue to this day. 

At 19 years old, my (fairy) Godmother, Sonia, gifted me a book that would change my life. You guessed it. You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay, a staple for every gay man across the globe. Perhaps my Godmother stumbled across my Fear Street collection and thought it was time for a gear shift. And thank the Goddesses she did! Hay’s simple yet powerful words showed me a new way to be with myself and others, and so began my love affair with the self-development genre. 

During my 20’s and early 30’s, I found myself caught in the hamster wheel of life.

Get up.

Go to work.

Auto pilot.

Finish work.

Get drunk.

Get high.

Party.

Come down.

Call up sick.

Do it all again.

There was no creativity, no writing short stories, no reading wonderful books, no soul food. Just work, and self-medicating with drugs and alcohol to cope with the mundane wheel.

Eventually, I landed in rehab; I was 33 years old, scratching my head…what happened to me? When did I become so joyless?

The rehab was very strict. No phones, no contact with the outside, no music, no reading material (unless it was self-help and approved by management). I took one book with me, which I had purchased a week before my admission into rehab. Journey of Souls by Michael Newton, a metaphysical exploration into the afterlife. 

My time in rehab allowed me to connect with my suppressed creativity, and I found myself writing again through journaling and working a 12-step program. For the first time in years, I discovered I had a new voice. A voice which had survived depression, anxiety, PTSD and addiction. My soul danced, and my mind sparkled as I drew inspiration from Newton’s wondrous observations of his subjects' experiences of the afterlife, soul selection and beyond.

My imagination was open and alive again. I felt more myself than I had in years. 

This awakening I experienced drew me to reading Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walshe, which deepened my love for the spirit realm. Not only was this a healing read, but it also opened my imagination up to the endless possibilities of our universe and beyond. In Walshe’s fascinating account of conversations he (claimed) had with 'God', he shows 'God' as a benevolent, funny and neutral friend who answers Walshe’s questions via his inner voice or as I interpreted it to be his intuition. 

I was compelled to strengthen my own spiritual practice through prayer, meditation, manifestation and learn as much as I could about religions, beliefs and the power of love. While on my ‘quest for enlightenment’ and felt the pull to start creating, writing characters who possessed supernatural abilities based on my learnings and spiritual research.

I fell in love with protagonists on spiritual quests and universal understandings. Antagonists with complicated motivations and mythological backstories. 

As I wrote these characters and their backstories, plots began to unfold, as though it were showing me rather than me writing it. I realised that I am a writer who is inspired by character development.

Two books which deepened my love for intriguing female characters were Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden and The Witch of Portobello by Paulo Coelho. In Golden’s stunning tale featuring tradition, glamour and high drama. The protagonist Sayuri, courageously navigates the complex world of the geisha system in Kyoto, Japan. From maiko to geisha, Sayuri’s predecessor and arch-nemesis, Hatsumomo (the most breathtaking character I have ever read), throws trial after trial at Sayuri via her jealous heart. I would have to say that Hatsumomo is my favourite antagonist of all time. Not only was I mesmerised by Hatsumomo’s lack of gratitude and entitlement, but I was also taken by her complexities, despite her successes.

On the other side of the fabulous character spectrum is Sherine Khalil, Coelho’s protagonist in his gorgeous novel, The Witch of Portobello. Exploring the divine feminine and spiritual philosophies, Coelho drew me into yet another one of his beautiful tales. Told through the lens of those who knew her, Sherine intrigued me as a complicated character full of zest and gooey sensuality. 

It is worth mentioning my love for ancient mythology (Greek in particular), which has inspired my imagination since I was a child. From Persephone’s infamous abduction to Narcissus and his self-obsession, these myths have always shown me the complexity of the human condition, relationship with self and others, and of course, the complexities of love and war.

I am inspired by interesting characters, universal truths and glamorous anecdotes; my reading list (as mentioned) has given me the courage to expand my mind and write from a place of my own truth (based on my life experiences). I enjoy pulling antagonists from my own traumas and heroes from strengths I've seen in others and in myself. Who says we can’t turn internal struggle into a great story to share?

By Danny Nercessian